Saying Grace (and meaning it)

Don't you ever struggle with the whole concept of "Saying Grace"? Sometimes I feel like it is just a ritual that you have to go through to eat a meal..or at least that is what my children seem to think..and that scares me to death. I know I may seem a bit over dramatic with that statement but seriously, I want nothing more than to raise God fearing, Jesus loving children into strong and stable Christian adults who know and love our Lord each and every minute of each and every day. Is that too much to hope? It seems not in the world we are in right now. It seems as if having a moral foundation is a punchline to some cosmic joke. My heart aches for what my children will have to endure if we as a generation cannot get our act together...AH!! anyway back to my point, I don't want loving and praising God feel like an obligation or a chore but rather a joy, a gift. So the question is simple. How?? Well that my friends the answer is also simple it falls right back on us (assuming you want the same thing for your children..if not well then it falls back on me and my husband LOL) to be the strong and stable Christians they need to mirror..with that being said the question is still: How?? Every idea that comes to mind feels so trivial..so to help answer this question I jump on the Internet in search of some all star Christians that have a blog and a layout (including a checklist) to guide my way and what I find is summed up here:

I actually saw this on this amazing lady's Facebook page

No.Joke. God loves us SOOOO much that he sent His Son to die for us and these are the ideas that come to mind? It's almost (no actually it is totally) embarrassing. 

I hope that you haven't read this far in search of some awe inspiring answer because it isn't here. This is all I got, I am so humbled by His greatness I couldn't put into words my gratitude. Lets try to give Him more, more of our time.. I mean rather than "saying grace" lets invite Him to the dinner conversation. In fact, "grace" shouldn't be ritualistic dinner prayer but a never ceasing conversation. (yes I am as nervous about that one as the you are!!) and lets ask for more. Lets depend on His strength and wisdom before our own, lets try not to ask Him to fix our broken bridges but ask Him to lead the way. 

After all of this I realize that no matter what I do to try to impose my will and my children it is their walk alone with Him, their journey. No one can lead them to the Father but through Him. I will help them to know Him through His word, through my actions and the rest is out of my hands.

Is this something you struggle with? How do you praise God each day?

I missed you today...

Dear Grandpa,

I missed you today, I miss you everyday but today was extra hard and I have no reasons why.  I miss your advice, you hearty chuckle and the smell of coffee. I find you in subtle ways, they sometimes take my breathe.  I try to hear you in the symphonies, and see you in the mountains. I miss you today. I miss your stern logic, quick wit and the flick of a lighter. I miss having the answers a phone call away. 

I am afraid. I am afraid I do not have your shoulders, shoulders that could carry the world. I am afraid I do not have your patience. I am afraid today. I am afraid I will make the wrong choices. I am alone at the helm. You told me that I was going to be up against a hell of a battle, but I never asked what you thought I should do. How should I lead? I am a child shaking in her shoes now I must be the adult, the parent, the guardian   

I have had to fight. I'm not a strange to pain and anger. I have had to take the lead, walk in no ones shadow. But this is different, although I didn't always see you I knew you where there, always standing ready. I am afraid of the absence. 

I cried today, until my skin was dry and my throat couldn't speak. I cried until I couldn't. I missed you today. 

I am an orphan. No where to go "back home". I have created a home for others, a soft place to land. but I feel without shelter, exposed and fragile. I feel weak and timid afraid of the fight. Afraid of what you might think. 

I hear the pipes play, the calls for battle. "Be still" or to be "Bold"? How would you fight this one? I believe you would chose both. Still in your heart, bold in your actions. I know what you would say but the words dont seem the same. I miss you today.

God Bless

Lydia 

Things To Do

Happy Sunday!! I absolutely LOVE Sundays! They always feel like a fresh start :)

I start each week off with a couple of lists to help get things done! 

My favorite motto: "Make a list, you'll feel better!"

I made these little gems after discovering this awesome blog.

So I limit the "To Do" part to 10 things... quality vs quantity, right? Anyway some weeks that feels like a lot and other weeks they get checked off by Wednesday. All depends I guess

 The "Teach" section is dedicated to a project, goal or thought I want to show my kids. This could be anything from teaching them how to bake cookies to wash their laundry to a prayer. It is mainly a reminder to focus.

The "Be" section is a bit more complicated..these goals are usually based off my mood and personality. For example the last few weeks I have been focusing on being "bold". I am putting confidence and conviction in my daily practices. Other weeks have been things like patience, affectionate and persistent. 

My favorite section is the "Learn" section this is usually where a pinterest recipe winds up, a new crafty idea, scriptures and the like. Last week I challenged myself to learn new "lunch spots" in town that are quick, easy and healthy, Acts 4:31-35 and to make coffee cozies. 

The "read" section is where I set my goals on how much I will get accomplished...this could be a certain number of chapters, an article or maybe even a bed time story.

I had my lists printed and bound on chipboard since I like to actually physically check things off, but you could just print them as you go. :)

I also made a simplified version for my kids that we go over each Sunday, theirs includes assigned chores and homework as well as "Be" goals and learning goals. Allowances and privileges are rewarded for list completions.

Kind of a random post, but for anyone who knows me AT  ALL knows that I have a list for nearly everything :) I know I am not the only one who lists....

My greatest ideas...

Are usually inspired by somebody else...

Now really, If I had such a great idea that was so cutting edge..an idea no one had already come up with..I would be stinkin' rich... but alas I am not. 

So let me take you to a conversation my husband and I had earlier today.

Scene: The car driving to church

Characters: Husband and Wife 

Extras: Four children babbling 

Plot: The never ending question...what to eat.

Okay so we are backing out of the drive way and the hubs is all "So what are we going to have for lunch?" (this is valid since we had just had breakfast an hour ago)  and I am like "Oh! I was going to make these little bacon, egg and toast cups...you take the bread and smoosh it into the muffin tin...blah blah blah" (his version)

Fast forward (not that Church needs to be fast forwarded..okay now I feel guilty! look here! Okay check back there in a few days and be caught up to speed..don't we all feel better now??)

Back at home Lexy and I start pulling out all of the necessary items needed to make these littles treats when my husband shouts from the study "This isn't your idea!" pointing at the computer screen laughing that he had caught me in some kind of web of lies. I respond no honey its Martha Stewart and Pinterest who inspired the idea but I do not see either of them willing to cook you lunch." ( I know the pinterest comment scared me too..its like its alive) 

He continues to act all "I am in on your secret" as I tried to explain that while I saw the idea iImade it ours..by adding cheese of course. He didn't stop talking until it was time to eat! After lunch I do not thing he cares where the idea came from :)

Also in the world of inspired by Pinterest!! I finally got my sewing machine threaded!! Even more totally awesome...I made a few bows! and some more with out the machine but add hot glue and third degree burns

 That my friends is what they call a stitch..or rather a series of them :)

Various hair bows made by lexy and I! Well I have chores to do! 

Good Night y'all!

Can you believe it?

We have been married for 10 YEARS!!! 

Okay actually pretend as if you have stepped into a time machine and are reading this on July 20th 2012. Okay, there? now read the header again!! Pretty cool huh?? If you don't have a time machine handy I guess I should say (because I am super crappy at blogging on time)

We have been married for 10 years, three weeks and one day!!!! (impressive, right?)

Well one thing we did do on time was celebrate!! So we took a little trip  to Paris!!

Okay, Okay! Paris on the Las Vegas Strip...actually we didn't even stay there...just thought the picture was pretty.

We took a drive down to Vegas and made like a couple of tourists...

First we went to the Mirage to check out the dolphins :)

Then we headed to our room at the Rio: here is our fabulous view ------>

Next we hit the pool for a little R&R

and here are the views from there----->

Yes they were lovely!! But here are the real views (drumroll)

WOW!! HUH? Probably one of the coolest things I have ever done! My weekend included three bucket list items! 1) riding in a helicopter 2) See a magic show 3) Ride a Zip line

Here is Ronnie at the set of Penn & Teller!! Pretty awesome show that we got to share with our friends :)

And here we are getting ready to head down the Freemont experience mid air on the Zip line!! Super Fun weekend :)

This is were I should input some totally awesome, loving quote or something about my marriage....

This is what I have got:

Thank you, God. My marriage is amazing, My husband incredible. My life is awesome. Thank you!

The Sweet Life!

Hello!!! Wow it has been FOREVER since I have been on here! The last few months have been super duper crazy as I spent most of every "spare" moment working on a women's retreat for my church! Which I am here to tell you turned out AMAZING!! Here is how it went :)

Let me first start off by telling you that while the retreat itself was such a uplifting and empowering experience  , the days and weeks leading up to the event that I spent in preparation taught me SO much. I grew each and every day closer to God while serving Him through bringing the women of His church together. 

I am so humbled and grateful for that opportunity.

Okay,  now on to the details. The Women's Ministry at SMCC The Springs Church has adopted the following verse as a what it is that we are setting out to do as a ministry.

"Therefore encourage one another and build each other up, just as in fact you are doing." 1 Thessalonians 5:11 

With a verse like that we needed to do something BIG to lift up the women at our church...I felt lead to show them how much they are worth and how much they are thought of, adored and mainly LOVED.

 The Summit Chateau Lodge was the perfect place for such a gathering! The lodge is one of the most beautiful, peaceful and welcoming places I have ever stayed. (The Plug: If you are EVER looking for a place to host a church, corporate or large family gathering this place has it all!! click on the link at the beginning of this paragraph for more details)

Not only is the lodge itself full of awesome amenities but the surroundings are awe inspiring

We went with the theme "The Sweet Life: Satisfying your craving for a sweeter walk with Christ"

As you will find it was an awesome theme to decorate with!

please note that the middle jar is full of spray painted pinto beans...this was a pinterest FAIL!! i would strongly recommend spending the $$$ on actual candy!

 When the ladies arrived they found individualized goodies bags waiting for them in their rooms. It was so fun to see everyone digging through their bags. We women are always the ones to get called when somethings missing, needs to be planned or really just plain handled (that was a bit girl power-ee but Hey I mean it)

So it was super exciting to be able to offer these exceptionally awesome ladies the opportunity to be surprised! 

One of the sweet suites at the Summit Chateau!

Miss Chastity's Goodie Bag!! Thanks for taking a pic! without this they would have gone undocumented!

 Meet Vikki! This women is responsible for me hearing myself in a southern accent while reading the Book of Ruth! #ikid #kindof 


Vikki Stringham flew nearly across the country to help us better understand and how to better search for Jesus is the Old Testament. She taught us how we are to search for our Redeemer is the world around us. How sweet is that? 

During the study many things jumped out at me, many things that I need to apply to my life. Things that I can use daily to be better...to be more whole.

One of the things that had touched my heart was Ruth's action. Vikki points out that Ruth did not just wait for step by step instruction from God...She jumps to her feet and is physically lead, guided to where she needs to go. 

Let's not sit and wait for a sign, let's be moved towards it!

Vikki said it best:

"Be the active body of Christ"

We had some awesome things planned for the ladies: rock climbing, zip lining and horseback riding! However, the winds were out of control...keeping us in doors without power for awhile somehow it was just what we needed. (funny how that worked out huh??)

Everybody seemed to keep themselves entertained...games, naps (without kids!!) and snacking!! lots of snacking :)

Here is my favorite photo from the whole event 

The whole group together! 

and the runner up.....

The Support Crew!!

Just as everyone was packed up and leaving the wind died down and their was time for two ladies and myself to go on a horseback ride! This was my blessing.  I had spent most of my weekend focused on the details I hadn't  stopped to see the whole picture! I am so thankful for the opportunity to see the forest!

 I know that it is has been a few weeks since the retreat but I want to thnak each of the women who made it out. Thank you for taking the time away from your family, your school, your job and the other day to day things to help each other grow in God's glory!


Can't wait to do it again next year!!

For anyone who is looking at this trying to figure out how to plan an event like this (I did a TON of blog stalking during this adventure) The retreat was held over the course of a weekend. Check in was Friday evening and check out Sunday morning. The schedule was pretty packed between lessons, small groups, worship and meals. There was free time scheduled. If you would like copies of the schedule please feel free to email me @ lnelson0122@gmail.com

Days 5: Test and a Trust

Day 5
Life is a test and a trust..so what have I been through recently that is a test?
Ha!! well let me tell you about a girl named Lydia, you see she has control issues that are in need of some working out, So this was an area she (and some people who swear they love her) identified as a weakness.
well you see this girl won't carpool unless she is driving, won't fly (must drive) and will meet you there before having you drive her...so there is some deeper issues there but basically she doesn't want to depend on anyone else,,right?
Well her car got impounded for the stupidest reason ever...owned the car an hour, got pulled over for a missing license plate, car impounded for a MONTH!! seriously..the courts even agreed repeatedly that this had to be some kind of loop hole but all in all I was screwed (yup it was me lol) anyway I learned to trust that there had to be a reason and as hard as it was to admit that i needed to be thankful for the opportunity to improve myself, to better understand.

It was a long month, (a reeeeeaaaaallllllyyyyy long month) but I learned that I do not have to be in control to have things work out. In fact, I am not in control of any thing really  and things are pretty good.

This post is two fold since the question is also what are you entrusted with?
Motherhood is a pretty obvious answer, right?To take care of these precious children to help them grow and mature into adults *shudders* that go on to do great things for the world. I think that is my most important assignment but I believe my assignment is a bit more than that but rather to care for people. to encourage and inspire. to help others grow..my kids, my sisters, my friends and myself..I guess that is what I feel compelled to do, what I was designed for, maybe that will change with time but as of now I am here to serve through compassion and awareness...

Okay I know it has been twenty some odd days since the last post but i have been journal-ling this stuff but should be caught up by tomorrow :)

Day Four:Habits that stick

The next lesson was a bit more fun. So considering I will be around for awhile..what is one thing I should start doing and one thing I should quit doing? Just one???

Stop: Doubting/stressing over what I have no control over. Focus on Faith and accept that I am not in control of anyone but me

Go: Take better care of my whole self: take time to reflect and give myself what I need. It may be a run today..a smoothie tomorrow...outreach the next day. But I need to listen to myself to find that out.

Seems to work on paper...  :)

Day Three: What Drives Me?

After two days of thinking about this question I have decided that I am driven primary from guilt. Yes of course I drive toward materialist goals however they are rooted in guilt; am I good enough? will my kids be upset?
Am I driven by fear? damn straight. fear I am not doing enough, being enough. Fear that there will never be enough...ummm sounds like guilt. Am I angry?...yup sure am. then I feel guilty for being, looking or sounding like those who have made me angry.Do I strive for others approval?? Every day..blanket statements are always directed towards me you know, like when my boss announces to the entire staff that we need to cut down on over time..I get all anxious and worried...which is super dumb: I am salaried!! Need a volunteer? announce it. I will guilt myself into it seeking your approval.
so the more I thought about this I stewed o and on..what am I guilty of?? well a lot I am sure, over complicating things, over analyzing, focusing on the meaningless.
I am learning this week that I am more broken and fragile than I ever thought. That I do not want to by driven by feelings of inadequacy but rather feeling completed by my relationship with Him. I want to lead the life I was created to complete

Day Two: Who am I?

So today I have been pondering who I am...the book asks me to think about character traits, back ground and physical appearance that I am struggling to accept. (and of course given the nature of this journey I must question how these things make me who I am , how do they make me stronger?)
 Character Traits:
I am stubborn, if I trust you and consider you a friend I will do anything for you..maybe even if it's not good for you. I will support you..If you have hurt me, well that's something I cannot easily forget and if I can remember it's nearly impossible to forgive. I can walk away from people..plain and simple no matter the history, relationship or any other factor. I do not know how or why I can do this, it hurts me to think I can be that cold.
Physical appearance:
Well I mean I would change a few things but it's nothing that gets in my way. I don't see someone I don't like when I look in the mirror..which isnt great for motivating myself to the gym but I am happy in my skin.
Background:
This is where it gets messy. I have seen good, bad and ugly in people that could make you sick. I have a hard time trusting people. I do not believe that anybody truly cares past what they need. I am insecure beyond what any of you may think. Anyway, I could bitch and moan about explain to you my relationships with my parents, their influences and the shit they put me through. I could tell you things that councilors just shake their heads at..poor thing. But I am over that, I can not and will not let any human being define me.
At this moment I find peace is the fact they did not create me the had me. I am not the flesh I was born to...and for that I thank God. I am not them. I am stable, loving and strong. I find peace knowing that there was a reason and it will help me with what is in store.

Day One: Let's start at the beginning

So in my last post I was pretty whiny..and self centered...me, ME and some more me.

The first point that is made in the book is simple to read but hard to understand: It's not about me (i know, right??)

I was created for His purpose by His purpose (and no I am not that special, so where you!) that in all of this confusion it is not for me to decide what it means to be great but rather except and grow into what God has had planned for me. In order to grow into this I must remind myself, without making it too much about myself, that is it about living for God, His purpose and that alone.

My first prayer is to thank God for my life, my creation and my salvation. To ask for wisdom, not to know it all but to listen to the hints, to follow His lead and then to understand my purpose.

What is the point?!?

This is a question that has been bugging me for quite awhile. I mean seriously..what is the point? why I am I where I am at this moment? why did this happen? why did that happen? why do we go through this motion or that?  okay okay.. I know this sounds super cliche however, it is a valid question.
For example, Why do we go to work? Obviously we need to earn a paycheck to pay the bills but what else do you get from this? How do you touch the world? shape lives? I mean every body has the opportunity, right? An ounce of kindness goes a long way...I just began looking at my career and thought it is obvious I can help people through some pretty dark times but maybe I can do more...I know I can do more...but how? and what is the purpose? to give me a warm fuzzy feeling? Maybe..but I doubt it. I need to think bigger..smarter...deeper.
After letting this eat me up for awhile I started picking apart everything..I mean everything..from chores to volunteering..to friendships..to my marriage...what am i doing to make this great? because if it is not great...WHAT'S THE POINT??? well I have come to decide that the point is to be great! To help others be great! but by what standards? who decides?
This is a very overwhelming topic that I am scared to death to explore...but I must dig deeper.
I have found in order to dig I must reach..higher than I can alone..I need help. So I will pray..for the next 40 days I am going follow the "Purpose Driven Life" by Rick Warren and I will reflect, learn and most of all grow. I am excited (and admittedly a bit nervous) to find out..or at least begin to discover, why.